How to Evaluate Whether Someone Loves You – Part 2
In our last post, I was just starting to go to the left, but in this post, I’m going as far as Pamela will allow me. I want to make certain no one ever fools you again into believing they love you, without the proof. The words alone will never again be good enough. God, the creator of the universe, didn’t just give you words, He gave you the life of His son. So why do we settle for simple words? Not on my watch. You’re not only going to evaluate the love others have for you, but you for another. This is important because the kind of love you sow is also the kind you reap. If you don’t sow “love”, you can’t reap it!
Caution: continue at your own risk!
“This is real love—not that we loved God [focus on self], but that he loved us [focus on others] and sent his Son as a sacrifice to take away our sins [the only things that can separate us from Him].”
Just “normal” love won’t do
I might not be the best bible teacher, but I can read it. The Bible says, “This is real love”. That would mean that fake, false or unreal “love” exists. It also means that it’s normal. It’s common and easier to find than “real love.” If you have to make a clarification of what “real love” is, then there’s a love out there that’s not real. Maybe the other type of love is just “normal” love or love that’s misunderstood by “normal” people. But He defines “real love” in this manner. It’s not that we love God, meaning we can’t focus our love on ourselves. It’s not a focus on self, but He loves us, meaning He pushed it towards us. Away from Himself, meaning a focus on others, and sent His son as a sacrifice to take away our biggest problem, sin. Not only did He make us the focus, He made sure that the one thing that could stand in the way of His love towards us was removed. What if this is an image of how you should love another or how another should love you?
Out Not In
What I realize in this passage is that Love is not self-focused. Love is other-focused. Here is “real love” demonstrated in your household, it is not when you say that you’re loved, but when you demonstrate love towards your family. It’s not when you say you should be the recipient. It’s when others should be the recipient. It’s not when I should want to receive love from my spouse, but it’s when I want to give love towards my spouse. That’s the definition of “real love.” It’s something that goes out of us not the stuff that comes towards us.
“Real love” will also say that I am a recipient of the love actions of someone else. If you want to define if someone loves you in your relationship, look at the actions that they demonstrate for you. Did they make any sacrifices for you? When a person sacrifices their own will towards you, that means they love you. When a person refuses to make a sacrifice of their own desires, their own wants, or their own needs that is an indication that there is no “real love” present. If there were, “real love” has the ability to make a sacrifice for the person you love, nothing more, nothing less. It’s an easy test to figure out if someone loves you or not. Are they willing and do they sacrifice for you? The opposite is true from your end. If you want to know if you really love someone, do you make the sacrifices for them, without the consideration of your needs, wants or desires, that’s being uncommon.
I’m tired of being misled in this area. Too many have been used and abused. What if you had a way to determine for sure that someone meant it when they used those common words: “I Love You”? Leave me a comment.