Is Your Relationship Anchored?
Redefining Relationships Part 2
Every building that stands and will continue to stand for years to come, must have the proper foundation. In New York City, where massive skyscrapers exist or any major city for that matter, the buildings are constructed with a foundation that can support the tens of floors that you can see above the ground. Do you desire a relationship that grows upward? If so, we need to consider its foundation. Your life is like a house, in this case a building, that must be built. In our imaginary building, The Tower of Love, a person enters on the ground floor so that they can experience and learn what it takes at the ground floor level.
The buildings mentioned above are like trees who have established a root system which are either buried deep into the ground or spreads wide across the ground. Just like these trees have expansive roots and the buildings have a great foundation so does any person who is connected with another via “love”. Without a good foundation or system of roots, there is no real connection to love. In other words, what you need to know on this ground floor level is that in most instances love doesn’t exist if a foundation or root system isn’t in place.
Why A Root System or Good Foundation
Your roots or connections with another do a couple of things that I can think of off the top of my head: 1) they anchor you and 2) they gather the nutrients you need to survive. Without these two components, there will be no growth and the relationship won’t have the strength it needs to endure the storms that often come in life.
The root system anchors you. It helps you to deal with the past. If you think for one instance that the past doesn’t impact you, you’re in for a surprise. The past is the past, but everything we have and who we are, are built on the past which is your foundation. Your ability to have a root system, anchors you and keeps you planted when storms come. We all know that in every relationship, storms are inevitable and will come when least expected. Without a good foundation, there’s not much to keep you in the relationship. You need a past to help anchor you. It’s these experiences, memories and historical accounts that tie you down when the outer shell and roofing get blown away. It’s the foundation that gives you something to build on, again if necessary. Ordinary people don’t realize that in love, we must already have some established boundaries and guidelines upon which we can assess those in which we intend to engage in a close relationship. The guidelines must be ones that can’t be shaken, turned nor disturbed. Your system of roots which provides your foundation must be so secure that it would take great effort for them to remove. Popular culture doesn’t demonstrate such a root system in most cases. Hence so many relationships and marriages get toppled by storms. You can see in society that most go into a relationship with no set boundaries and change their standards to accommodate a significant other. In essence, they tear out their foundation and you can only image what that would do to a building. In the same way a building is impacted by a shifting foundation, so is your life, home and relationships. With that said, your goal is twofold: create a good foundation with the person you’re in relationship and get to know what your partners foundation is so that together your root systems interconnect. Now that, my friend, was worth you visiting nolongercommon.com.
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The root system gathers the nutrients you need to survive. You might not see the connection yet, but it’s having a root system that helps you for what’s ahead-your future. For a tree to grow to its fullest potential, it needs nutrients. Starve the tree and it dies. In the same way, your life, your home, your relationship needs nutrients. It must be nourished. Most don’t even have a foundation, the system of roots, or the set of standards needed to provide the nutrients needed. This disqualifies them from engaging in a lasting relationship, yet they don’t even know it. For those with no standards or too few, relationships result in pain and disappointment. Expectation go unmet because, they never understood the foundation upon which they were building upon. Because of the lack of a solid grounding, a person is easily swayed by anything that comes along. They are easily convinced to give up their “life savings” for another without any proof of it being a good investment. This phrase “life savings” is thrown out to mean their possessions such as a car, a home, and even their bodies without having proof that the other party is worth taking the risk. They are willing to move to distant lands without consideration of the future. They get in over their heads. This is all common stuff that you know happens. Since we know this, then we can use what we know to combat it. There’s no excuse. Now that we can see what’s coming naturally, we can take advantage of building a root system so that we are least likely to make the same normal mistakes as most. When a relationship is well nourished, and the couple takes their time to build, they are well invested. Because of this great investment, they become unlikely to bend or break under the pressures that life can throw their way.
Your life, your home, your relationship is like a house that’s being built. Are you going to build yours with a plan? Are you just going to throw your life, your home, your relationship, together by any means? Or are you going to build it by first starting with a good foundation? What can you do to strengthen the foundation of your relationship? Leave a comment below.
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