The Business of Marriage Part 1
Most, at least initially, think of the fun and excitement of the idea of marriage. When you hear the word, “most”, think 51% or better of all those you know. The reason they, we, think of the fun and excitement is because we don’t know what work it takes to have a successful marriage. That’s evident by the number of failed marriages. We even discredit those who try to give us a warning or advice of the same. We think, in our mind, that those who give such a warning or advice are the minority.
Everyone knows the relationship called marriage will bring excitement, enjoyment, pleasure and happiness. So I choose not to talk about that because that part of the relationship is easy and will take care of itself. The fun in your marriage will take care of itself, but there’s a part that won’t. It’s the business of marriage. What’s that you say? I had to come up with a way to explain to many what happens outside of the fun. There’s work that must be done. In fact, have you ever heard the phrase, “pay now or pay later”? To continue to have fun, you’ll need to pay. If you try to have fun without paying, you’ll pay anyway, more, but later. Why not pay along the way so that you can play along the way. You can’t have it any other way.
Marriage: The Merger (or Marriage is a Merger)
Marriage is business, big business. It’s like a merger, it is a merger. I’ve been apart of several company mergers in my career. The most recent involved three companies at once. Each company wanted to push its processes and procedures on the other two. It’s as if the employees forgot it was a merger. They needed to merge, like getting onto the highway, but failed to. You must learn to merge with others.
“and the two are united [merged] into one.’ Since [because] they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart [it will be difficult to pull apart] what God has joined together.”” – Mark 10:8-9 NLT
A marriage is the same. A merger of two individuals must take place. The problem is that one person or both want to do things their old way. In a company merger, one company will have to decide to take on the other company’s leadership, but at the same time the leadership will have to consider all companies’ culture. At the end of the day, neither of the companies will remain the same, a new company will emerge. The same should happen in a marriage, when the two individuals come together, the old persons disappear as the new individuals emerge. This gives them an advantage, they can have the best of each other’s world when creating their new world. That’s the definition of successful marriage.
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In a people-merger like marriage, the two parties have to consider such business as, but not limited to, the following:
- Church and Religion. What church will we attend? Sounds like a business decision? It does and will require a meeting of the minds.
- Home, Personal and Education. What are each other’s personal ambitions and goals for home and furthering education? More business , right?
- Relationships (Children, Parents, Siblings, and Friends). What new relationships has each person gained and how do we, together, deal with all these new relationships? Wow, now that even sounds like more business to consider.
- Recreation and Government. What does our down-time look like and involvement with our community? Did you ever think that marriage would have all this business to handle?
- Work, Career, and Business. What are your career and business plans? How do they align with your family’s plan? Marriage sure does sound like a business, right?
I know that’s a lot to think about, but the point is, you’re thinking. Marriage is business, but that business, if done well, can be a lot of fun. That is one of the reasons Nolongercommon.com exists to show you how the uncommon do marriage. Have fun with your business, your marriage; it’s success is in your hands.