From Now to Death Maybe a Long Time

Marriage is a Gift – Part 1

In today’s post, I will begin a message set on marriage and I don’t want to run anyone way.  This is not a post to convince you to get married, not to get married or to get out of a marriage.  This post isn’t to show you that your marriage is off track neither will it tell you how to get it on track.  My goal is to give you an uncommon perspective on the topic we know as marriage.  So please clear your mind and throw out all you think you know about the topic.  That’s what I’ve done to even broach this subject.

I get it, marriage is a bad subject for 2/3 of any audience.  One-third, has been impacted by a marriage gone wild.  The other one-third are experiencing some type of marital turbulence as we speak.  And the last one-third are those whose marriages are doing well and are in a good place.  So for 2 out of 3 people you meet, you may hear a negative thought regarding the subject.

You’re reading a blog post from a website called No-Longer-Common.  Since “common” always represents the normal or the majority (i.e. 2/3 of the people with bad experiences), then it’s no wonder the topic brings bad feelings.  This is why I’m not focusing on the problems or issues or how to have a good marriage.  I’m focusing on impacting what you know about marriage in order to rid you of your “common” thoughts and replace them with some uncommon ones.  Let’s begin and remember we’re “Redefining Relationships“.

“Till Death Do Us Part”
Did you really know that a marriage lasts “till death do us part”?  You see society teaches us differently.  Marriage lasts for a number of years.  No!  Marriage has but one expiration date and that day is when one of the two die.  If I were coaching a couple contemplating marriage, I’d ask them have you considered what the distance is between now and death?  From now and death could be a very long time.  Decades.  A lifetime.  Speaking of time, it’s time we start thinking about what we will do from now until one of us dies.  What’s the plan?  On my coaching site (kerryaclark.com), I help people put together their life’s plan and executive it.  A marriage must be a plan that gets executed for a lifetime.  A marriage is a business that must be run and made to be successful.

My Happiness Or Yours Doesn’t Matter
Over the course of time, happiness can become a problem.  It’s the most common reason why marriages ends.  She doesn’t make me happy.  He no longer makes me happy or fulfills my needs.  You know what I say to such talk?  She never made you happy in the first play.  He never gave you happiness at any time of the relationship.  That stuff, happiness that is, comes from God.  The only time happiness disappears is when we move it from where it was and place that responsibility on the person we’re looking at.  Think about it, when you “found new love“, the other person didn’t do anything to make you happy.  You were happy and excited all on your own and vice versa.  It wasn’t until you placed that responsibility on their shoulders did you lose your way to happiness.  Happiness is something that is subjected and influenced by time and there’s a lot of time to be considered.

By the way, marriage has nothing to do with your happiness, it’s a covenant.  In marriage, a covenant, you should be willing to be unhappy at the expense of your spouse being happy.  #Covenant #TillDeathDoUsPart – I just felt like adding a couple hashtags in there for you.

[note note_color=”#E3EAEE” text_color=”#060A09″] [/note]

You Are The Ultimate Possession
You definitely don’t want to hear this and that’s why I’m going to say it.  In marriage, you are your spouse’s possession.  Whoever told you differently is incorrect and this adds to why so many haven’t lasted.  Listen to this, “The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband gives authority over his body to his wife.” ‭‭That’s from the Bible!‬‬  Sounds like possession to me.  My point isn’t to tell you, you belong to another person like a slave, but rather marriage has a high price tag.  You are giving control of yourself to another from now until death.  Have you considered how long that is to yield control of your person?  Then on another note, you pay for what you get.  The more you give (of yourself), more is given to you.  Are you willing to pay to get what you want out of the marriage or relationship?  It’s going to cost you a lifetime, from now until death do you part.

As I stated earlier in this post, it’s time to stop thinking ordinary, common thoughts.  It’s time out for letting popular culture trick us and leave us wanting more, but not getting it.  My goal is to enlighten and even elevate your thinking on the topic of marriage.  We can be just like the majority if we want to, the problem is we already know where that will place us, in the two-thirds.  I want what the minority, the one-third, has.  I want a real understanding of marriage so that I can create a real plan to have a real marriage.

Question:  Can you think of another “common” concept regarding marriage?  I’d love to study those for the “uncommon” truth. Leave a comment below or click here to email me.